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‘They’re taught that showing feelings is shameful’: eight reasons men don’t go to therapy – and why they should

A clinical psychologist on why men still don’t seek help for their mental health

When Jake, a businessman in his 50s, first arrives at my therapy practice, it’s obvious that he has some misgivings. Jake’s marriage to Louise is in trouble, and she has insisted he come and see me. “If not for Louise, you wouldn’t be here, would you?” I enquire tentatively. He looks sheepish at first; then emboldened, he gives an emphatic “No.” As is almost always the case, Jake’s wife has registered a problem that has passed him by, and prompted his visit. Over the next few weeks, we sift through a maze of obstacles, and in the end, Jake is full of emotion: “I’m alone in the world, everyone leans on me, there’s no one for me,” he says. “There’s no one to turn to.”

It’s a common pattern, one I’ve seen throughout my 35 years as a psychologist specialising in male mental health. Men make up only 33% of referrals to NHS talking therapies. They don’t come easily, and when they do seek help in a crisis, they can disappear as suddenly as they arrive. Yet male vulnerability is clear – men report lower levels of life satisfaction than women and make up three-quarters of suicides and problems with addiction. But despite the increase in awareness around male mental health, men still tend to think there’s a stigma to speaking with a professional, even though most of those who have tried therapy have a positive experience.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 15:00:24 GMT
It is beyond naive for Democrats – and Europe – to think Trump’s retreats are real. He never backs down for long | Jonathan Freedland

Whether it’s Minneapolis or Greenland, the US president will do just enough to get through a damaging news cycle, then carry on as before

Don’t be fooled. When it comes to Donald Trump, what might look like a full retreat is almost always a mere tactical withdrawal, designed to buy time. He’ll step back when he’s forced to, under pressure, but will then revert the instant the pressure lets up. Too often, his opponents, whether at home or abroad, allow themselves to be played, confusing a mere pause for a surrender – and the risk is strong that they’re making that same mistake all over again.

This week, the US president won praise in some quarters for moving to “de-escalate” the war he has been waging on the people of Minneapolis. Following the killing of Alex Pretti, an intensive care nurse who posed no threat and yet was shot at least 10 times by masked agents of Customs and Border Protection or CBP, Trump signalled that he wanted to calm things down.

Jonathan Freedland is a Guardian columnist

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 17:08:18 GMT
Eggs, hats and unfettered ambition: what we learned about Melania Trump from her documentary

The first lady’s political goals, high-stakes clothes fittings and hints that she and Donald still have sex are just some of the highlights from Brett Ratner’s documentary

• Review: Melania is a gilded trash remake of The Zone of Interest
• News: a front-row seat on Melania’s ominous UK opening

Melania’s appears an entirely airless existence, in which she glides solo about gilt corridors in silence, David Lynch-style, observed by tight-lipped heavies. All her staff dress in deference to her, mostly in black, but sometimes – as in the case of her interior designer – in a matching camel-coloured three-piece suit. Candidates interviewing for assistant roles have also got the memo, lining up in a sea of monochrome, with buttery hair and prominent cross necklaces.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 15:13:44 GMT
The unexpected stars of the Premier League season so far

Harry Wilson, Igor Thiago, Dominic Calvert-Lewin, Jack Grealish and Antoine Semenyo have shone for their clubs

By WhoScored

Harry Wilson was often a spectator rather than a player in his first three seasons at Fulham. He made 89 appearances in the league, but 48 of them were from the bench and he was taken off 34 times. Having scored just 12 league goals in three years, he was nearly shipped off to Leeds in the summer.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 18:00:34 GMT
‘A place of two halves’: how Margate’s art-led renewal has left town ‘splintered’

Madonna labelled it ‘heaven’ on a recent visit, but the cost of living in the seaside resort is hitting many residents hard

Not many chefs working in small, family-run restaurants expect global megastars to turn up for dinner and to design them a menu from scratch.

But that’s what happened to Simona Di Dio last weekend, when she cooked dishes inspired by her Italian grandmother’s recipes for Madonna, who sat on the single wooden dining table in Di Dio’s cosy, candlelit Italian restaurant in Margate’s old town.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 19:14:28 GMT
How to stay warm while exercising outdoors: 16 expert tips for running, hiking and swimming

Exercising in winter can feel brutal without the right kit. Here’s how runners, hikers and outdoor swimmers keep cosy when the temperature drops

The best moisture-wicking underwear, socks and base layers

There’s a glorious smugness that can only be experienced by exercising outdoors in winter conditions. The fresh air, the endorphins, the reduced risk of heart disease – they’re all nice bonuses, but nothing beats that knowing nod from another rain-drenched runner, or the horrified faces of nearby dog walkers as you stride confidently into the sea for a winter dip. There’s only one catch. In order for that intoxicating feeling to exceed the very real sting of the cold, you’ll need to make sure you’re suitably layered up.

Whether you’re running, hiking or outdoor swimming, there’s some sage advice that applies across the board: “Always start by checking the weather forecast,” advises Richard Shepherd, purchasing director at mountain sports retailer Ellis Brigham. “What you wear should match the conditions you’re likely to experience. It’s the key to staying safe and comfortable outdoors.”

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 10:00:34 GMT
Jeffrey Epstein sent money to Mandelson’s husband after prison release, emails suggest

Convicted child sex offender asked accountant to ‘send 13k dollars’ to partner of then UK business secretary

Jeffrey Epstein sent thousands of pounds in bank transfers after his release from prison in 2009 to Peter Mandelson’s husband, according to emails published by the US Department of Justice on Friday.

The latest documents raise fresh questions about Epstein’s relationship with Mandelson, who was sacked as the UK’s ambassador to Washington when details of his support for the disgraced financier emerged in September.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 18:43:01 GMT
Andrew went to intimate dinner with Epstein after his prison release, files suggest

Famous figures including Woody Allen were invited to party with disgraced financier and Mountbatten-Windsor, documents indicate

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor attended an intimate party with the convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein months after he was released from prison, files suggest.

The US justice department released another cache of documents relating to the disgraced financier on Friday.

In the UK and Ireland, Samaritans can be contacted on freephone 116 123, or email jo@samaritans.org or jo@samaritans.ie. In the US, you can call or text the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline on 988, chat on 988lifeline.org, or text HOME to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor. In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is 13 11 14. Other international helplines can be found at befrienders.org

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 19:03:34 GMT
US justice department releases more than 3 million new pages of Epstein files

Batch will include more than 2,000 videos and 180,000 images, deputy attorney general Todd Blanche says

The US deputy attorney general, Todd Blanche, said on Friday that the justice department had released more than 3m pages of documents related to its investigation into the disgraced financier and sex offender Jeffrey Epstein, in a long-awaited announcement that appears to represent the bulk of the so-called Epstein files that have dogged Donald Trump politically.

In a testy news conference, Blanche said that the release would include more than 2,000 videos and 180,000 images, which will have “extensive redactions”. He added that the Trump administration had produced roughly 3.5m pages in an effort to comply with the Epstein Files Transparency Act. He said that they include large quantities of commercial pornography and images “that were seized from Epstein’s devices”.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 17:37:13 GMT
China has lifted sanctions from six serving British MPs and peers, Starmer says

Starmer confirms immediate removal, but it is unclear if sanctions remain on former MP, academic and barrister

China has lifted the sanctions it imposed on serving British MPs and peers in a significant sign of warming relations after Keir Starmer travelled to Beijing for landmark talks with Xi Jinping.

Nine UK citizens were banned from China in 2021, including five Conservative MPs and two members of the House of Lords, targeted for highlighting human rights violations against the Muslim Uyghur community.

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Fri, 30 Jan 2026 14:37:28 GMT

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